There’s one major difference between the two.
Hearing uses only the ears. A hearer recognizes what word was said, how it sounded, and even the volume and pitch of the speaker.
On the other hand, listening uses the ears AND the other senses. A listener uses her eyes to see the body language and hand gestures. She notices the mouth moving and sees the scrunched up face of the person who communicates with anger. She feels the weight and force of the words as they leave the persons’ lips. She can almost smell the fright on the person who can’t leave his wife because of what might happen to the kids. She can taste the tears as they come down a little girl’s face.
What stops us from becoming true listeners is that we’ve learnt to only use our ears. It’s time to recognize that listening is a sensory experience. Yes, it requires more brainpower than we can currently spare. Yes, there are a multitude of other things you can do. And yes, it is a time-consuming process.
But the difference between being heard and being listened to, is like the difference between looking at a picture of the Grand Canyon and hiking it. There’s not even a comparison.
Go ahead. Make listening a full body experience. I promise you the person being listened to will feel the difference.
A New Source Code 