Dreaming of self-sufficiency

Some time ago, I had a dream that really shook me to my core. I hope that you’ll allow me to share this with you.

I was chasing after a bandit who had stolen a unique detonator. It had the potential to launch a rocket that would annihilate Russia and start a global war. (Sometimes I have these weird Mission Impossible style dreams. I swear, I’m only partly crazy!) We were on a mountain which kept spiraling and the bandit was headed straight for the top. My colleague and I were in hot pursuit of him.

Suddenly, the bandit disappeared. But I knew that based on his tracks, that he turned right. I followed, rounded the bend and then I started to skid. Panic gripped me. I was headed straight off the cliff!

Luckily, I managed to hold onto the cliff face, leaving my legs dangling in the air. I took a few breaths, settled myself and started pulling myself up the rock face. I could see the end – I only had 5% more to climb and then I would be on level ground. But I felt exhausted. I didn’t know how much more I could go. My arms felt heavy and my fingers started slipping. I knew I was going to fall.

At that point, I shrieked for help. I was terrified. Then, just as I was about to fall, my friend appeared and lifted me up to safety. Then I woke up!

I know what you’re thinking: What a crazy dream!

But the reason it shook me was I realized that: even in my dreams, I’m not quick to ask for help. 

I foolishly believed that I should have been able to climb up all on my own. That asking for help made me look weak. That I was not worthy.

Can you imagine that? I was about to die, and I didn’t want to ask for help.

The thing is, this happens more often than we think. We are all perfectionists to some degree. It’s a badge of honor in our culture to be self-sufficient. And I believe that’s the problem. We are not quick to lean on someone. We don’t ask for help. We believe that you have more worth if you can do it all on your own.

What we need to do instead, is ask for help. Ask for help early and often. It’s the only way for us to actually get things done. Because the fact is, we can’t accomplish anything alone. No matter how much we think otherwise.

Let’s not have to fall off a cliff to ask for the help we truly need.